I dream to one day live in a world where EVERYONE calls EVERYONE out on their BULLSHIT. I tell my friends and family to do this to me. Call me out! Please! Just look me in the eyes and tell me the truth, you won't hurt my feelings. We're all supposed to be adults here.
When I was about 30 yrs old, my sis-in-law saw me in my swim trunks and jokingly asked me "if I needed all that", referring to my copious love handles. It hit hard, but motivated me to lose the fat, start lifting weights, and keep fit for the last 25+ years. I owe her big time!
Congratulations and good on you for improving yourself! They key part of what your sis-in-law said was that it was a joke, as you put it. She is saying something thats honestly uncomfortable for both parties, but at the end of the day she was still going to love you like family. She was just saying something out loud that most people just keep inside their head.
Nowadays she would be electronically burned at the stake and likely lose her job for a comment like that. The insanity is maddening. Congratulations to you on your clear thinking and serious self-assessment; if only your thinking was that of every college professor and schoolteacher in the world.
There is no contradiction in helping each other improve and accepting each other as we are.
I fertilise my apple-trees to improve the crop and their health, yet they remain apple-trees all the same.
The woke (for want of a better term not violating decorum) rule by creating false, artificial dichotomies where none exist - to their way of thinking the world works like this:
IF: [A] = [Good]; THEN: [Not A] = [Bad].
That is normal for humans under age 2 or so, but not after age 4.
I dream to one day live in a world where EVERYONE calls EVERYONE out on their BULLSHIT. I tell my friends and family to do this to me. Call me out! Please! Just look me in the eyes and tell me the truth, you won't hurt my feelings. We're all supposed to be adults here.
When I was about 30 yrs old, my sis-in-law saw me in my swim trunks and jokingly asked me "if I needed all that", referring to my copious love handles. It hit hard, but motivated me to lose the fat, start lifting weights, and keep fit for the last 25+ years. I owe her big time!
Congratulations and good on you for improving yourself! They key part of what your sis-in-law said was that it was a joke, as you put it. She is saying something thats honestly uncomfortable for both parties, but at the end of the day she was still going to love you like family. She was just saying something out loud that most people just keep inside their head.
Nowadays she would be electronically burned at the stake and likely lose her job for a comment like that. The insanity is maddening. Congratulations to you on your clear thinking and serious self-assessment; if only your thinking was that of every college professor and schoolteacher in the world.
No, in-group can shame other humans all they want for whatever they want, as long as the victim is seen as a member of the out-group.
Agreed.
"If no one tells me when I do something wrong, how am I ever to improve?"
There is no contradiction in helping each other improve and accepting each other as we are.
I fertilise my apple-trees to improve the crop and their health, yet they remain apple-trees all the same.
The woke (for want of a better term not violating decorum) rule by creating false, artificial dichotomies where none exist - to their way of thinking the world works like this:
IF: [A] = [Good]; THEN: [Not A] = [Bad].
That is normal for humans under age 2 or so, but not after age 4.
I told my Son the same recently. I am certainly learning a lot. I asked for it. : )
Funnily enough I actually think I inherited this belief from my mom. She never sugar coated ANYTHING lol. I am grateful for it though.
We grew up with: pull the bandage off quickly; it hurts less.