I English, we have only one form of the infinitive "to be" and it sounds permanent. Saying "I am an accountant" is tantamount to a reflection of identity rather than career, as does "I am bipolar" or "I am a Democrat."
But what if you're no longer that thing?
In other languages, Spanish included, two forms of "to be" exist, one permanent, …
I English, we have only one form of the infinitive "to be" and it sounds permanent. Saying "I am an accountant" is tantamount to a reflection of identity rather than career, as does "I am bipolar" or "I am a Democrat."
But what if you're no longer that thing?
In other languages, Spanish included, two forms of "to be" exist, one permanent, and one temporary, to indicate to the listener what the speaker is referencing. So in English when we say "I am..." followed by an idea or a belief (or God forbid, a mood), we tell our brains that it's always going to be that way.
In turn, letting go and changing one's mind about the topic is tantamount to losing one's identity. Of course that's terrifying, so we just...don't. We rigidly cling to the belief-as-Self even in the face of changing information.
Beware of your "I am" statements, and hold loosely to your ideas. Practice nonattachment but act with conviction.
When I teach emotions I emphasize this point because language matters so much. What we tell ourselves absolutely impacts how we view the world and our Selves (capital S), and when we don't say stuff accurately it can really hamper communication, understanding, identity, mental wellness, and much more.
It's a bit like 'I am sad' instead of 'I am feeling sad'. That one word can make a huge difference. It removes identity and replaces it with temporality.
Great point about the importance of what ideas can be expressed via language!
I think this is a bleed-through from those careers that are very close to a lifestyle. Police, military, fireman, all kinds of artists and musicians and writers come to mind.
Whereas f.e. a plumber or a teacher need not "wear their professional suit" after hours, a fireman (or a nurse) is sort-of always on-call should circumstances warrant they act.
I think this has permeated the English language ever since the idea of lifelong career with a pocket watch and a pension at the end was demolished in the 1980s. Now, everyone is simply an easily replaced meat-robot the same way it was a century and more ago (Chaplin's 'Modern Times' and Lang's 'Metropolis' shows the ideas of industrialism, futurism and modernism better than anyone), and therefore identification (or rather: "identifiction") has become both the ocean to drown in, and the lifebuoy to cling to.
Thank you, but I can't take credit - it is something I was taught when I started working in a factory, at age 15, making parts for water taps.
"Who you are when you go home, that's you. At work, no-one cares because we're here to do a job and get paid, that's all." is the gist of what the older men told me back then.
I blame Google for the "bring your whole self to work" nonsense that's completely collapsed the professional work environment. No, man, bring your work self to work and leave the other stuff home.
I blame Google for lots of things, but this one I think is older than them. I'd date it to the 1970s, and the radical feminist ideal of "the private is political". If one grows up being taught that, /everything/ becomes political, including your identity.
As I asked students and colleagues many-a time:
"How do you hammer a nail in, in a feminist manner?"
Never fails to raise hackles, and "feminist" can of course be replaced with any identitarian moniker. It's a good question I think, for showing the folly of making everything political, when almost nothing really is.
Tibetan is interesting - they have a ‘be’ for things that are generally accepted (but you haven’t seen yourself) and a ‘be’ for things you’ve experienced or seen with your own eyes.
There’s a similar concept from (I think) German philosophy: “Wissen” which might be called “secondhand information or belief (which could be true or false)” and “Erfahrung” which I take to mean “firsthand knowledge, from one’s personal experience.”
I English, we have only one form of the infinitive "to be" and it sounds permanent. Saying "I am an accountant" is tantamount to a reflection of identity rather than career, as does "I am bipolar" or "I am a Democrat."
But what if you're no longer that thing?
In other languages, Spanish included, two forms of "to be" exist, one permanent, and one temporary, to indicate to the listener what the speaker is referencing. So in English when we say "I am..." followed by an idea or a belief (or God forbid, a mood), we tell our brains that it's always going to be that way.
In turn, letting go and changing one's mind about the topic is tantamount to losing one's identity. Of course that's terrifying, so we just...don't. We rigidly cling to the belief-as-Self even in the face of changing information.
Beware of your "I am" statements, and hold loosely to your ideas. Practice nonattachment but act with conviction.
This is beautiful. In Gaelic apparently they say stuff like “sadness is upon me.” So yes, a temporary state.
When I teach emotions I emphasize this point because language matters so much. What we tell ourselves absolutely impacts how we view the world and our Selves (capital S), and when we don't say stuff accurately it can really hamper communication, understanding, identity, mental wellness, and much more.
It's a bit like 'I am sad' instead of 'I am feeling sad'. That one word can make a huge difference. It removes identity and replaces it with temporality.
I like this. It's not just phrasing.
Great point about the importance of what ideas can be expressed via language!
I think this is a bleed-through from those careers that are very close to a lifestyle. Police, military, fireman, all kinds of artists and musicians and writers come to mind.
Whereas f.e. a plumber or a teacher need not "wear their professional suit" after hours, a fireman (or a nurse) is sort-of always on-call should circumstances warrant they act.
I think this has permeated the English language ever since the idea of lifelong career with a pocket watch and a pension at the end was demolished in the 1980s. Now, everyone is simply an easily replaced meat-robot the same way it was a century and more ago (Chaplin's 'Modern Times' and Lang's 'Metropolis' shows the ideas of industrialism, futurism and modernism better than anyone), and therefore identification (or rather: "identifiction") has become both the ocean to drown in, and the lifebuoy to cling to.
Just re-watched Metropolis with the restored discovered South American footage.
Agree.
You just got a follow. 😊
That’s very deep.
Thank you, but I can't take credit - it is something I was taught when I started working in a factory, at age 15, making parts for water taps.
"Who you are when you go home, that's you. At work, no-one cares because we're here to do a job and get paid, that's all." is the gist of what the older men told me back then.
I blame Google for the "bring your whole self to work" nonsense that's completely collapsed the professional work environment. No, man, bring your work self to work and leave the other stuff home.
I blame Google for lots of things, but this one I think is older than them. I'd date it to the 1970s, and the radical feminist ideal of "the private is political". If one grows up being taught that, /everything/ becomes political, including your identity.
As I asked students and colleagues many-a time:
"How do you hammer a nail in, in a feminist manner?"
Never fails to raise hackles, and "feminist" can of course be replaced with any identitarian moniker. It's a good question I think, for showing the folly of making everything political, when almost nothing really is.
Now it's "equity"
Tibetan is interesting - they have a ‘be’ for things that are generally accepted (but you haven’t seen yourself) and a ‘be’ for things you’ve experienced or seen with your own eyes.
There’s a similar concept from (I think) German philosophy: “Wissen” which might be called “secondhand information or belief (which could be true or false)” and “Erfahrung” which I take to mean “firsthand knowledge, from one’s personal experience.”
So useful! I love languages.
I agree with your last statement. The only thing I ever truly grew attached to was my umbilical cord, and they didn't even save it in a jar for me.