92 Comments

I typed in:

Why do cats push everything off of tables?

Answer:

Meow. Meow meow. Meow - meow meow. Meow meow, meow. Meow meow - meow meow meow. Meow meow. Meow meow - meow. Meow meow meow. Meow meow meow meow. Meow.

Seems legit.

Expand full comment

So much for getting anything done today!

Expand full comment
founding

Question:

Why is it no matter how many toys I leave out for you or how interesting the environment may be, you choose to sit on the one piece of paper I'm trying to read?

Answer:

To make you do stoopid hooman tricks!

Expand full comment
founding

I asked about "Why should cats rule the world?" I agree with everything except the 13th through the 16th meows which are obviously self serving.

Expand full comment

Here’s the thing.. FI will always surpass AI, because not even AI could know what a cat is thinking... c’mon man!

Expand full comment
Mar 27, 2023·edited Mar 27, 2023

AI is another con. It only contains answers that support the narrative. You know AI is phony when you can essentially write a TED talk with it.

If you go down the rabbit hole of AI you will be convince of how dumb you are. It will also be learning much more from engaging humans than you will learn from it. By design it is like CBDC i a one way mirror.

My dad said, don't share what you know with a stranger. If you do they will know what you know and what they know. You are at a disadvantage. As the decades go by my dad and mom's wisdom shines forth.

Expand full comment

The fact that somebody thought this up gives me hope for humanity!

Expand full comment

When you slow blink does it REALLY mean you love me?

Expand full comment

What type of toxoplasmosis does an AI cat give?

Expand full comment

"Trained to decline walks..." My cat would beg to differ, other than string there's nothing she loves more than being taken out for a walk. Of course she walks me more than I walk her, but hey, such is the nature of Cat.

Expand full comment

There is a near-perfect cat meme on Telegram last month, riffing on the "Yes Chad/Nordic Gamer" meme, with YesChad on the LHS (canonically the 'inferior' side) and a cat on the RHS.

YesChad: "Thank you for changing my life."

Cat: Shut up.

Y'all just have to imagine it, because the $9/hr coders (sic) responsible (sic) for the Substack comment functionality (sic) - the Windows Phone of comment systems - failed to include such 20th century notions as IMAGE EMBEDDING ffs.

They could've used a better cat.

Monkey - the cat that lives in my flat and lets me feed him - took one look, sniffed, yawned and started "playing the cello" - so either he

(a) loved it;

(b) hated it;

(c) was indifferent; or

(d) felt like licking his own butt purely by coincidence.

Expand full comment

Is my my cat plotting to kill me?

Given the huge wad of cash being cuddled by a cat in the video and the tone of the meows.

Yes.

Expand full comment

I didn't take it as criticism.

Expand full comment
founding

AI?

Or did the Protomolecule finally realize that it is humans that were long ago domesticated by gatos, not the other way around?

Expand full comment
Mar 27, 2023·edited Mar 27, 2023

There’s a woman in a bikini on the beach just left of the cat twisting in a pretzel on the couch. Little tiny lady wearing a bikini. I’m talking about the picture on the opening page where he talks about toxoplasmosis.

Expand full comment

why do cats race around the house and scream their heads off after they use the litterbox?

"Meow. Meow meow. Meow - meow meow. Meow meow, meow. Meow meow - meow meow meow. Meow meow. Meow meow - meow. Meow meow meow. Meow meow meow meow. Meow"

Expand full comment