92 Comments

I typed in:

Why do cats push everything off of tables?

Answer:

Meow. Meow meow. Meow - meow meow. Meow meow, meow. Meow meow - meow meow meow. Meow meow. Meow meow - meow. Meow meow meow. Meow meow meow meow. Meow.

Seems legit.

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why do cats push everything off tables? because they can. they'll also push everything off counters, dressers, and any other flat surface. I stopped replacing printers after the fifth deskjet was pushed off the file cabinet. before the internet, no one believed me when I told them about this cat habit. now it's an accepted fact of life. the truth will out!

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maybe the question is not "why do cats push things OFF tables?"

and really ought to be "why do humans put things ON tables?"

cuz you're kinda the only species that does, just so you know...

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We have two stuffed animal chickens on a mantel. One of my cats jumps on a window sill, reaches over, knocks them off, daily. We put them back up, daily. It's just something we do. It's something we both can count on in this crazy world.

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Your cats have you well trained.

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I guess they do. That's okay, I don't mind. I need a break from critical thinking.

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I surely didn't mean it as a criticism.

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we all need spiritual rituals.

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Mind. Blown.

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a gatito after mine own heart (here in Bad Cat Cottage). my question was never, 'why did you do that?!' but always, 'will I never learn...'

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I think the solution is to put your printer on the floor.

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lol tried that, but they insisted on putting their paws well into the exit, 'helping' me remove printed pages from trays, trying to keep blank paper from going into the belly of the printer(s), etc., ad nauseam. their dedication is but one of the reasons this became Bad Cat Cottage decades ago. cage-free and hundreds through the doors over the years. always loved the 'bad' cats...

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😂 I thought my 4 cats and 3 dogs were tough to deal with.

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check the printer and filing cabinet for all your missing socks...:)

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lol I don't wear socks! but Her Fuzzy Highness used to sneak into people's homes and bring me jewelry. she'd also check on renovations in the neighborhood and bring things like allen wrenches home. when things went missing, everyone learned to come to me...

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That is a wicked smart cat imo

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she was amazing. a near-dead 4-week-old rescue who (nursed on my ear and) couldn't go out for adoption because anyone else who tried to touch her wound up in the ER. literally. I could tell stories of her genius for days...

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Ooh, that is so cute. You are a saint for rescuing the baby!

So I know dogs are not as smart as cats, BUT, I had a dog Magoo (short for Mr. Magoo), who found his way back home from 75 miles, after 5 weeks, and was fat too boot, when he showed back up.

He was also run over twice, shot once (for stealing chickens) and had to fight every dog in the neighborhood in order to keep his "alpha" status.

Oh the good old days of the 70's/80's when a dog could just be a dog...and go free range.

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Barrettes and hair clips and earrings as well

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Skrunchies here

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I’ve had Siamese and part Siamese cats for decades. They never pushed things off, ever. Now I have a tabby. Nothing is safe.

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"Excuse me, stewardess. I speak Cat."

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I'm sorry, I don't understand?

I'm just apawled! That sounds clawfully close to racism Mr. Pi.

lol. stupid

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"Golly."

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I asked why America lost in Afghanistan. Got the same answer.

Amazing stuff and a little scary. Cats are over, AIs are gonna take their jobs.

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if the AI had come back with:

"Becasue Brandon's decsions lacked purrrrpose in Afghanistan", I would have died.

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I have it on good authority that the proper translation is:

"Collectivist Catastrophe".

Explains pretty much everything.

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I have a radi-claw idea; being AfghaniStained is the purrrrpose!...:)

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We keep this up and we both will be tossed into the great litter box of life.

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Fur sure

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Catapostasy

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They are not just pushing things off tables. You are mistaking the finger for the moon.

They are trying to teach you some quantum gravity: "You see, this glass is on the floor and broken, and I did not do it? It was already broken when you put it on the table"

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the Buddha lives in every cat.

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Very similar to the answer I received to the prompt, "give me a good example of cat poetry." 🐈

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So much for getting anything done today!

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standard

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Yeah, but at least now you don't have to think up an excuse!

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I keep asking questions but keep getting the same answer or maybe I’m not paying attention. Meow, meow, meow….

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Looks like a purrrfectly valid answer to me......

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Question:

Why is it no matter how many toys I leave out for you or how interesting the environment may be, you choose to sit on the one piece of paper I'm trying to read?

Answer:

To make you do stoopid hooman tricks!

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The only one The Husky Dawg ever wants to play with is the one I'm holding.

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Right?!

I have 2 dogs and a cat. They all love each other...but sometimes I wonder if they're conspiring against me!...:)

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*nods* They are. For sure.

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If you were mouse sized, your cat would torture you and then maybe eat you.

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She might! Although she gives herself away by "missing" me when I come back from biz trips.

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I asked about "Why should cats rule the world?" I agree with everything except the 13th through the 16th meows which are obviously self serving.

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lololol

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Here’s the thing.. FI will always surpass AI, because not even AI could know what a cat is thinking... c’mon man!

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AI is another con. It only contains answers that support the narrative. You know AI is phony when you can essentially write a TED talk with it.

If you go down the rabbit hole of AI you will be convince of how dumb you are. It will also be learning much more from engaging humans than you will learn from it. By design it is like CBDC i a one way mirror.

My dad said, don't share what you know with a stranger. If you do they will know what you know and what they know. You are at a disadvantage. As the decades go by my dad and mom's wisdom shines forth.

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"You know AI is phony when you can essentially write a TED talk with it."

I assumed the problem was that everyone who gives TED talks seems to be an artificial life form.

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Not AI. They do have the stamp of approval of those trying to run the planet right now. AI cannot begin to explain life or Gaia. That is how I checked it out. As best I can I have been down in the weeds of Gaia/Earth. AI came up way short of explaining Gaia. I have learned recently that certain statements are mind stoppers. I have seen that in myself. But in general when encountering a mind stopper (long before the term emerged) I wanted to turn over that rock.

AI statements are mind stoppers. "Nothing to see here" as they say. AI has searched all there is and this is the final word. I can move on now. With Gaia at least it is not even close to the final word. The work of Jame Lovelock scientist and dedicated collaborator Lynn Margulis PhD on the Gaia Hypothesis now accepted as a theory and buried in Earth Systems Science, cannot be so easily covered.

Out of sight out of mind and AI is there to facilitate it being so.

I didn't say much about the books written by James Lovelock and by Lynn Margulis, but there available if you are interested in a deep but very accessible dive.

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The fact that somebody thought this up gives me hope for humanity!

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We’ve come so far. Seems like just yesterday nyan cat was all the rage.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=QH2-TGUlwu4

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When you slow blink does it REALLY mean you love me?

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*bliiiiiiiiink*

Maaaaaaybe?

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What type of toxoplasmosis does an AI cat give?

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toxoplasmeowsis by infectious digisites?

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... a Trojan Horse?

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"Trained to decline walks..." My cat would beg to differ, other than string there's nothing she loves more than being taken out for a walk. Of course she walks me more than I walk her, but hey, such is the nature of Cat.

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There is a near-perfect cat meme on Telegram last month, riffing on the "Yes Chad/Nordic Gamer" meme, with YesChad on the LHS (canonically the 'inferior' side) and a cat on the RHS.

YesChad: "Thank you for changing my life."

Cat: Shut up.

Y'all just have to imagine it, because the $9/hr coders (sic) responsible (sic) for the Substack comment functionality (sic) - the Windows Phone of comment systems - failed to include such 20th century notions as IMAGE EMBEDDING ffs.

They could've used a better cat.

Monkey - the cat that lives in my flat and lets me feed him - took one look, sniffed, yawned and started "playing the cello" - so either he

(a) loved it;

(b) hated it;

(c) was indifferent; or

(d) felt like licking his own butt purely by coincidence.

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Is my my cat plotting to kill me?

Given the huge wad of cash being cuddled by a cat in the video and the tone of the meows.

Yes.

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I didn't take it as criticism.

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AI?

Or did the Protomolecule finally realize that it is humans that were long ago domesticated by gatos, not the other way around?

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Eric Frank Russell wrote a short story called "Into Your Tent I'll Creep" in which one of the members of the first alien expedition to Earth discovers what dogs are actually up to.

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Dogs domesticated humans long before cats could be bothered with it.

Book sounds fun, I'll have a look.

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There’s a woman in a bikini on the beach just left of the cat twisting in a pretzel on the couch. Little tiny lady wearing a bikini. I’m talking about the picture on the opening page where he talks about toxoplasmosis.

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And so there is, outside on the beach, viewed through the window behind lounging gato. I guess men’s eyes are specially designed to detect such things, lol!

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😉, not naked though, clearly a bikini

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*inspects contents of DB's coffee mug*

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No I’m in recovery, lol, that’s the old me.

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Now I understand why I had 6 Old Fashioneds on Saturday. I was trying to make up for you.

OK, now - anyone else I'm drinking for this week? I might have to stock up.

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Cheers 😉

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L'Chayim!

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To Life: thanks and thanks for another new word, I have 2 new words today, the other being sheeple

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why do cats race around the house and scream their heads off after they use the litterbox?

"Meow. Meow meow. Meow - meow meow. Meow meow, meow. Meow meow - meow meow meow. Meow meow. Meow meow - meow. Meow meow meow. Meow meow meow meow. Meow"

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