I have this urge to go put some of these “I support the thing” signs in some of my neighbors yards. We live in the lowest crime area of our city in NC, and it’s all custom brick homes with perfectly manicured lawns. About half our neighbors are completely detached from consequences and thus reality. The woke neighbors are 100% NIMBYs.
It’s a well armed neighborhood, but the “I support the thing” neighbors are completely rules for thee. It became insanely obvious through Covid and extends to guns and security even though we don’t yet have any actual crime (I’m sure it’s coming because the city voted like 78% Biden). They think people “like us,” not currently getting robbed, stabbed, raped, shot at can “handle” guns, but “less educated” people can’t, even though they are the victims of actual crime.
My neighbors would know exactly who did it, since they complain about the fact it’s not worth going anywhere more than 5 minutes from home because of the raging crime and I’m quick to remind them they voted for it. 😂. Fortunately in person most people still have a sense of humor and while annoyed they’d at least laugh. At least I think they do.
I'm sure they'll allow for debt if you are willing to pay off the interest. Just imagine having to retweet the latest CDC study 5 times for every heretical quip you deliver.
And when it reaches zero, you die. Just like some role-playing-games. If one of your primary attributes hits zero, you just die. You can't live with 0 STR, INT, WIS (or SOC).
You could start with a BLM one. Then you'd only have one empty spot left! Oh wait, I got another one! An assault rifle with a diagonal red line crossing it. That's it, free toaster! Woohoo!
Why does it take longer and needs more energy to produce darker slices? It's like the dark slices are disincentivised. I demand more thermodynamic justice!
African Americans have the greatest rate of obesity of any demographic, yet the woke obsession is confined to only the label rather than the contents of the bottle which is essentially a tub of high-fructose corn syrup -- the #1 precursor to obesity and diabetes.
It's OK to be fat and sick so long as you're not offended by the label.
So... only hand out the toaster if it has a dynamo and pedals attached, but no cord and plug for the wall socket? (Sorry, I guess socket and plug are cis-het hate-speech but I'm not up on speed to the right terms.)
An equitable toaster will of course only toast Breads Of Color. It will automatically detect and refuse to toast White Bread (or apportion less toasting power to achieve less toast-ness for White Bread).
You know, this bug thing. I mean, they're crunchy, right? Very crunchy. For sure.
So I'm seeing Bethany Gaskin, the Queen of Mukbang, being paid a billion dollars by the govt. to give up crab for just one video, and eat bugs instead. Instantly, a million people will join her. No, really, I think this could go somewhere. BUG MUKBANG! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CZVNI7VPUO4
Throw in the abortion one, as well. You can join the ranks of the ever-cerebral Dee Snyder of '80s hair band sensation Twisted Sister, a poster child for post-birth abortion if there ever was one.
To be fair. No one misquoted Trump. Trump pointed out in his experience, a great number of women are attracted to him because he is rich and a star and they throw themselves at him.
For some reason we have people that do not know about this phenomenon and pretend it does not exist. The women he supposedly grabbed, he was going to see her that day and they were going to go shopping together for furniture. Not the behaviour of someone that has been assaulted.
I like the pussyhat Christina Blasé Ford wore, with the pink cerebral cortex design which one-upped everyone else’s. “I’m not just an ordinary pussy! I have a BRAIN, TOO!!! I’m not just another follower-ditz, I’m special! I’m biting beer-boy Brett Kavanaugh right in the ass!
Thank you for continually shining a light on the insanity of our current paradigm. To go through the world thinking so differently than the majority can be a lonely road. Your writing is one of those places that helps to validate that different isn't crazy. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Babylon Bee offers a (satirical) app called SIGNLR... "Algorithms within Signlr analyze virtue signal trends across the Internet and, as soon as a new one is detected, update all your social media to fit the current narrative." The perfect companion to your Loyalty Card!
If there's flour and yeast around, there will be bread in my house. Actually, I have 100 pounds of flour so I'm good. The world is full of turkeys, God knows.
I'm just thinking back to spring 2020 where it was not at all a given that there were flour and yeast around. And that was without an ongoing military conflict hampering agriculture.
Yes, I know. Which is why I have been stockpiling "to the rafters". Even before the current threat of world famine and skyrocketing food prices, I have been a prepper. For years. It's in the blood, as I tell people; Father was a Mormon and Mother was a tree squirrel. It's good to be prepared. Think we have at least a winter's worth of food put by. My goal is two years' worth. It takes planning, commitment, know-how and some space, but it can be done.
But don't worry, folks, Bill Gates is gonna take all that ag land he bought up and feed the whole world!
Let’s remember that Dr Simone Gold is in prison right now, just a few days into her 60 day sentence for “trespassing”. She’s a political prisoner, a doctor and attorney in a very scary environment. We’ve been hearing every day about Britney Griner (who also doesn’t deserve the sentence she has in a Russian prison) but the US is being equally arbitrary and punitive. It’s a damned shame. Whatever we can do to support her, let’s do so.
This type of comedy takes 100 points off your social credit score.
That’s a funny reply. Sarcasm not allowed. Check.
Guilty of malign creativity.
I have this urge to go put some of these “I support the thing” signs in some of my neighbors yards. We live in the lowest crime area of our city in NC, and it’s all custom brick homes with perfectly manicured lawns. About half our neighbors are completely detached from consequences and thus reality. The woke neighbors are 100% NIMBYs.
It’s a well armed neighborhood, but the “I support the thing” neighbors are completely rules for thee. It became insanely obvious through Covid and extends to guns and security even though we don’t yet have any actual crime (I’m sure it’s coming because the city voted like 78% Biden). They think people “like us,” not currently getting robbed, stabbed, raped, shot at can “handle” guns, but “less educated” people can’t, even though they are the victims of actual crime.
My neighbors would know exactly who did it, since they complain about the fact it’s not worth going anywhere more than 5 minutes from home because of the raging crime and I’m quick to remind them they voted for it. 😂. Fortunately in person most people still have a sense of humor and while annoyed they’d at least laugh. At least I think they do.
there is a lot of that going on in Loudoun County Northern Virginia 35 miles west of the cesspool.
Is 0 the lowest you can go?
I'm sure they'll allow for debt if you are willing to pay off the interest. Just imagine having to retweet the latest CDC study 5 times for every heretical quip you deliver.
🤮
That's deep, man
And when it reaches zero, you die. Just like some role-playing-games. If one of your primary attributes hits zero, you just die. You can't live with 0 STR, INT, WIS (or SOC).
On living in Coronamania Clown World:
https://markoshinskie8de.substack.com/p/coronamaniagreen-acres-and-living
The creativity is so malign.
"Your card has been declined, sir. Your bank account has been frozen due to a series of online posts our fact-checkers have declared misinformation".
You could start with a BLM one. Then you'd only have one empty spot left! Oh wait, I got another one! An assault rifle with a diagonal red line crossing it. That's it, free toaster! Woohoo!
and then there’s the elections big lie
kitten’s gonna need a bigger card
Bonus toaster upgrade that ensures your toast is never " racist white "
the world needs an equitable toaster
i believe there is a racial disparity in access to properly toasted pumpernickel
Why does it take longer and needs more energy to produce darker slices? It's like the dark slices are disincentivised. I demand more thermodynamic justice!
Anyone questioning this is obviously antisemitic.
Entrepreneur, right there
And no Aunt Jemima syrup on those toaster frozen waffles
African Americans have the greatest rate of obesity of any demographic, yet the woke obsession is confined to only the label rather than the contents of the bottle which is essentially a tub of high-fructose corn syrup -- the #1 precursor to obesity and diabetes.
It's OK to be fat and sick so long as you're not offended by the label.
So... only hand out the toaster if it has a dynamo and pedals attached, but no cord and plug for the wall socket? (Sorry, I guess socket and plug are cis-het hate-speech but I'm not up on speed to the right terms.)
https://static.wikia.nocookie.net/gilligan5935/images/c/c2/Generator.png/revision/latest?cb=20140821222239
Perish the thought!
Oh forgot, no Land of Lakes butter! In honor of the now Cleveland Guardians and Washington Commanders
H/T to the person that first said "they removed the Indian but kept the land" on the box of butter.
I'm thinking, I'm thinking. Need to do something more with drag queens and trans kids here...my mind is running riot...
Remember the crayons that were marked "flesh" -? Hmmm.
It only has a single setting: burn.
Will it assure that the toast is always burned? Because, you know, black toast matters.
An equitable toaster will of course only toast Breads Of Color. It will automatically detect and refuse to toast White Bread (or apportion less toasting power to achieve less toast-ness for White Bread).
😂🤣 But, of course, is that not a given?
a way bigger card is needed
And Greta.
Can't believe I forgot Greta. 🤦
I know. She is, after all, unforgettable.
She will never replace Greta Garbo.
Hardly. BUT, they are now both on Swedish postage stamps.
I want to be left alone...
You will eat the bugs and you will be happy!
You know, this bug thing. I mean, they're crunchy, right? Very crunchy. For sure.
So I'm seeing Bethany Gaskin, the Queen of Mukbang, being paid a billion dollars by the govt. to give up crab for just one video, and eat bugs instead. Instantly, a million people will join her. No, really, I think this could go somewhere. BUG MUKBANG! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CZVNI7VPUO4
How about "I stand with Taiwan"
Nice. But has that really become a current thing? Because many people who determine what the next thing is actually stand with China.
I stand against West Taiwan...
I will now refer to PRC as West Taiwan in all conversation.
Now that is a phrase we should try to make viral! It would light a fire in the ass of Xi and his gang.
Good, maybe we'd finally get this over with before he has another 10 years to build up.
I think it's really kind of cheating on the "Latest Thing" promotional company to put masks and jabs together.
perhaps each booster should also be separated out too , for each winter of death and summer of death
Spring and fall of illness and incurable injuries, yes!!
Throw in the abortion one, as well. You can join the ranks of the ever-cerebral Dee Snyder of '80s hair band sensation Twisted Sister, a poster child for post-birth abortion if there ever was one.
That's the pink pussy hat appearing after Twitter but before monkeypox.
Subtle. I didn't realize that was a thing.
It was first used at the 2017 Women's March and was a more general feminist symbol but has become more or less exclusively about pro-choice.
Think they first used it as a reference to Trump's constantly misquoted "pussy" remark.
To be fair. No one misquoted Trump. Trump pointed out in his experience, a great number of women are attracted to him because he is rich and a star and they throw themselves at him.
For some reason we have people that do not know about this phenomenon and pretend it does not exist. The women he supposedly grabbed, he was going to see her that day and they were going to go shopping together for furniture. Not the behaviour of someone that has been assaulted.
indeed. "soooo offensive"
Good grief, Biden and Clinton and probably Oblamer are worse by far
I like the pussyhat Christina Blasé Ford wore, with the pink cerebral cortex design which one-upped everyone else’s. “I’m not just an ordinary pussy! I have a BRAIN, TOO!!! I’m not just another follower-ditz, I’m special! I’m biting beer-boy Brett Kavanaugh right in the ass!
I wouldn't want my brain located in my vagina. It would cause problems for so many reasons.
Dr. Ford must have really misunderstood human anatomy.
A friend of mine knitted one with teeth, though, which was worth quite a good laugh.
"Pussy hat"? Well I learned something new today 🤣
We like your thinking on that. Our HR person will be contacting you soon.
Unfortunately the toaster only works when connected to a wind turbine. That will cost you another 1,000,000 loyalty cards.
And you can only toast bread when the wind is blowing.
Thank you for continually shining a light on the insanity of our current paradigm. To go through the world thinking so differently than the majority can be a lonely road. Your writing is one of those places that helps to validate that different isn't crazy. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
I really felt this. 😅🙏🏼
You say it well, Spencer. Thanks.
Support The Current Thing Company to stay up to date on your virtue signaling gear! https://yuribezmenov.substack.com/p/how-to-build-a-killer-business-and
Oh boy, sending my next stimulus check right to TCTC! Wait a minute, maybe I gotta wait till I win the lottery, as I don't want to underinvest.
Bonus points towards a set of 6 steak knives for best redefinitions of:-
pandemic; vaccine; disease; inflation; recession; woman.
I'm thinking commemorative plates from the Hamilton Collection.
Babylon Bee offers a (satirical) app called SIGNLR... "Algorithms within Signlr analyze virtue signal trends across the Internet and, as soon as a new one is detected, update all your social media to fit the current narrative." The perfect companion to your Loyalty Card!
Will there be a reliable supply of bread by Thanksgiving though? 😬
Ouch...reality injection
Candy companies have already said no Halloween specialty candy.
It's not gonna be pretty. I anticipate a riot in my local elementary school.
If there's flour and yeast around, there will be bread in my house. Actually, I have 100 pounds of flour so I'm good. The world is full of turkeys, God knows.
I'm just thinking back to spring 2020 where it was not at all a given that there were flour and yeast around. And that was without an ongoing military conflict hampering agriculture.
Yes, I know. Which is why I have been stockpiling "to the rafters". Even before the current threat of world famine and skyrocketing food prices, I have been a prepper. For years. It's in the blood, as I tell people; Father was a Mormon and Mother was a tree squirrel. It's good to be prepared. Think we have at least a winter's worth of food put by. My goal is two years' worth. It takes planning, commitment, know-how and some space, but it can be done.
But don't worry, folks, Bill Gates is gonna take all that ag land he bought up and feed the whole world!
Wait, no credit for global warming (I mean climate change) support?
The current thing for 30 years and counting.
Can we add on Global Cooling from the 1970s?
Let’s remember that Dr Simone Gold is in prison right now, just a few days into her 60 day sentence for “trespassing”. She’s a political prisoner, a doctor and attorney in a very scary environment. We’ve been hearing every day about Britney Griner (who also doesn’t deserve the sentence she has in a Russian prison) but the US is being equally arbitrary and punitive. It’s a damned shame. Whatever we can do to support her, let’s do so.
The two remaining stamps are:
- EV vehicle purchase
- Gov't schools are the best
Or put more spaces on the card
Just to be clear: The end point is not "free toaster" or "free toast". You are the toast.
Yeah, well. Better than being white, I guess.
Some true loyalists got cards way before Biden. And they got Extra bonus pts for blm stamps
You have an advanced case of cattitude!!
Haha!🤣
don't forget climate change/planet earth extinction